This is further proved by the events of this last week. A week ago Friday, a family friend got into a car crash. He is okay- no injuries were sustained and there was only minor car damage. Unfortunately, that was only the beginning of such things because on Monday, my grandmother passed away.
It was not unexpected, but it was sudden. My family and I had figured on having a couple more months with her. She was dealing with cancer and a dissolved vertebrae in her back, but she was happy until the very end. On Saturday, her leg began to swell and sometime between Sunday night and Monday morning, she passed.
I didn't find out until after eight o'clock that evening because I'd asked to not be told at school. My grandmother firmly believed in the values of education, and I felt that she would prefer me to stay at school rather than to spend my day in depression. It just so happened that I also had a meet that afternoon and didn't end up coming home until eight. It was as I was getting ready to do some homework that my mother told me my grandma had passed.
I didn't know how to take this. The last I'd heard, she was fine- or as fine as she could be. I'd just visited her the weekend before and she was cheery the whole day. I accepted it though, because what else could I do? She was gone- she is gone- and the best thing I can do for her is to live my life in a way that will make her happy.
Her calling hours were Friday night. I spent most of the time with my other grandmother and my aunt who drove an hour to be there for my parents, my brother and I. I wore heels- they're miserable- and I held my head high because that's the way she'd want me to stand.
I didn't cry. I almost did. One of my cousins created a really lovely slideshow to play throughout the evening and it was filled with all kinds of pictures of my grandma with her family. One of these pictures shook me to my core, even though I made that very picture my profile picture earlier in the week.
My grandmother was the one who instilled a love of baking in me. She taught me to make a proper pie crust. She taught me to make the chocolate pudding to fill it. She taught me to make cookies and so many other things. But she didn't just teach me to bake.
She taught me to love life no matter what it threw at me. She taught me to hold my head high whatever the situation. She taught me to value quality over quantity and worry more about the amount of love I received rather than the amount of money. She taught me to have faith, always, and she didn't care what faith it was so long as I had some.
She would sit with me, and listen to me talk for ages about school, theater or music. She loved hearing about the things I was doing, the things my brother was doing or my cousins. She loved knowing that she had grandchildren who were passionate about something, and she was happy with that.
Today, three of her grandchildren are in college. Three are in high school (two are on track to graduate with honors) and all are on track to graduate on time. Three are in middle school. And one is in elementary school- on track- despite some odds.
She left behind ten grandchildren and four kids. All of whom have either made a life for themselves, or are on track to do so. I have never been more proud to be related to someone than I am to be related to her, and I'm sorry that I didn't always realize that when I had time to spend with her.
I'm going to miss you, Grandma, and I hope your smiling up there the way you always did down here.
In loving memory of Margie Ann Havansksy,
March 14, 1937-September 21, 2015
Beloved sister, mother, and grandmother
